So I have to ask:
Is it really that hard to understand that Z's "reality" is different from what most of us consider the "real world" ? Is it too much to ask people to try and understand that no matter how much you try he will never see the same thing you and I are seeing?
We're not asking for people to bend over backwards for him. We're not asking for people to let him take the easy way out. Just a little extra patience and compassion because as frustrated as you may be with the fact that he can't do the simplest of things; think about the fact that he's the one who knows exactly what he wants but can't get the damn words to come out of his mouth. Can you imagine?
Let's go there.... imagine that you go out to dinner with your friends or family and are having a great time and the next thing you know you are waking up to the bright lights of a hospital room. Imagine there are people standing over you talking to you but they sound like they are speaking to you under water.
You try to talk to them but they aren't acknowledging you. You start screaming at them, but they will not pay attention to what you're saying. You hear odd squeaking/garbled sounds and you suddenly realize that it's you! The words in your head will not come out of your mouth! You reach to touch someone to get their attention so that you can maybe write a note but your arm just lies there unable to straighten your fingers. You have to be taught how to do everything all over again, from writing and speaking, to dressing and feeding yourself. Can you imagine how scary and frustrating and lonely that would be?
How much compassion and patience would you hope someone would have for you?
The funny thing is that we do have compassion for people when things like that happen. We help them out, give them therapy, encourage them. So why I ask is it so hard to do the same for a small child that has their whole life ahead of them?
I cannot help people who are afraid or uncomfortable around Z, it's going to happen. I cannot help the people who are ashamed or embarrassed by him.
The idea of trying to force the Autistic mind into mainstream society so that it "fits in" or appears "normal" is the equivalent of trying to force a square peg into a round hole and then saying "Bad square, bad square" when it doesn't fit!
I make no apologies for the fact that OUR SON will NOT be raised to be ashamed of who he is; will NOT be raised to be afraid of telling people he has AUTISM, will NOT be made to feel bad as if it makes him a lessor person, will NOT be made to feel like he has to be "normal", and will NOT grow up not understanding why he is different.
I will also make no apologies for the fact that Z WILL be raised to be PROUD of who he is and everything he accomplishes, he WILL be raised to EMBRACE and CELEBRATE his AUTISM; he will learn to help educate others and to help teach patience and compassion through learning to have patience and compassion of his own for those who would taunt him or dismiss him out of their own fear and ignorance!
I haven't written a blog for a few months, frankly because I was angry about a few things and the things I wanted to say would not have been productive. I guess that's a sign that maybe I'm growing up after all, in the past I would not exercise such restraint, just ask my poor husband! lol ;)
New things on the horizon for Z and for us and I look forward to spreading a little "pAUsiTISM" in the next few blogs! (Sorry, I couldn't help myself!)
